The Amazing Benjamin Boys

I know, deep in my heart, that I’m doing a good job with my little hellions angels…but sometimes I’m pretty sure my neighbors think I’m killing them…or that they’re killing me…and how is it that I’m just now figuring out that parenting is a loud endeavour? Someone is always yelling…or berating…or whining…and it’s not just them…

And then there are those blissfully peaceful moments, after they are finally asleep…wow, who are these precious-looking children? I check on them every night before I go to bed…I gotta check to make sure everyone is covered and has their pillow and that no one is close to falling out of bed…I hate to admit that I never ever did that before we moved, and definitely never when I was still married…

I am in awe of them at these moments…because I know it won’t be like this forever…

They are as different as night and day…Aidan is all flailing limbs, nervous energy, anxiousness, and desperation to be the center of attention…he is my whirling dervish…Sean is the quiet one, the sweet baby that everyone immediately falls in love with…but don’t piss him off…Aidan taught me to be afraid of waking up a sleeping child…Sean wakes up easily, and immediately sits in my lap for a cuddle…there is something about little arms wrapped around my neck that takes my breath away…

Until I hear Aidan read or watch him draw or listen to him spin a wild tale…and I think, “Is that my child? Did I help make him into this? Wow.”

It’s a given that the loud, whining, frustrating moments far outnumber the quiet, sweet moments…maybe that’s just my house…but then they’re fighting to be the one closest to me for a snuggle…or they argue over whose Mommy I really am (and I remind them that I’m Mommy for both of them)…

I am often annoyed, frustrated, exhausted, overwhelmed, and just downright over it…and then something happens, and I am reminded that they will grow up and I won’t get these moments back…and the amazing thing? It took a divorce and the withdrawal of The Ex from their lives (his choice, not ours) for me to appreciate being Mommy…to truly realize just how precious they can be, and just how lucky I am…there may be a part of me that really is maternal…

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About Michaela Mitchell

A few things come to mind easily when I think of myself - a mom, a friend, a daughter, a hard-worker. But there's so much more to me - and I just have to discover what it is.

Posted on February 25, 2012, in Raising Boys and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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