Last Week’s Hell Was Worth It…

I started smiling at 5:15am on Saturday and didn’t stop until about 9:45pm on Sunday…I only hit the snooze button once on Saturday and the morning routine was the smoothest it’s been in months…the boys didn’t fuss…I wasn’t stressed or worried…I was anxious to get there, though…

Saturday morning was with my mom…Saturday afternoon and night was all BFF and margaritas…oh hell, the margaritas!

Sunday was This Man…and it was perfect…I was the most relaxed and content I’ve ever been…there were no worries, no stresses…just blissful time spent together away from our real lives…and no, I’m not giving details – I don’t kiss and tell…

I stopped smiling at 9:45pm because that’s when I needed to leave…he had things to do, and I needed to be back home for a meeting this morning…and I felt like I was being punched in the gut…I felt like a part of me was being ripped in half…

I listen to my instinct, my gut, to get me through life…and every fiber of my being said not to leave…not because something bad was going to happen, but because it was wrong…I do what I’m supposed to do whether I want to or not all the time…this was no different…

I cried…I hugged him…I drove away, sniffling…and then I do what I do best – I put my emotions to the side, buried them where they couldn’t hurt me, and moved on…life has to go on regardless of what I might want to happen…

But I miss my mom…I miss BFF…and I miss This Man…and my world no longer feels quite as right as it did this weekend…

Every temper tantrum, every aggravation, every moment of The Ex’s idiocy last week was worth it for 2 days of life being right.