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The Benjamin Boys’ Mean Mommy

Bet you didn’t know I’m a mean Mommy, did you?  Yep, that’s me…Mean Mommy.  I wear that title pretty well, and I’m pretty damned proud of it.

Sean ratted me out at daycare this morning.

Sean: “My mommy made me mad this morning.  She made me cry.”

Daycare: “How Sean-Sean?” (Gotta love that everyone calls him Sean-Sean now…)

Sean: “She made me cry because she wouldn’t listen to me.”

This is the same child who ended up at the office in a time out because he was so bad for his teacher today.  Sweet Sean-Sean?  Yes, I know, I was shocked too.

He woke up crying, because Mean Mommy made him get out of the bed and try to use the potty.  Mean Mommy also made him put on clothes, socks, and sneakers.  Mean Mommy gave him a banana for breakfast and couldn’t pull the coveted Brown Sugar and Cinnamon Poptart out of her butt (that’s what happens when little boys get a hold of the Poptarts while Mean Mommy is sleeping on a Saturday morning)…

And that “she won’t listen to me” line?  Straight from Aidan…

*****

Aidan (sobbing): “You aren’t listening to me, Mom!”

Me: “Well, tell me again.  Help me understand.”

Aidan (wailing): “You don’t understand me, Mom!!!”

Me (confused): “Help me understand.  Say it again.”

Aidan (sobbing and wailing): “You just don’t get it!!!  You never listen to me!”

Me (annoyed): “WHAT don’t I get, Aidan?!”

Aidan (sniffling): “I didn’t want pizza, Mom.”

Oh holy hell, really?

*****

Mean Mommy makes Aidan do homework, eat dinner, and shower before watching Netflix (no more cable) or play on his Nintendo DS. Mean Mommy requires that both boys pick up (most of) the toys each evening.  Mean Mommy doesn’t tolerate whining, complaining, backtalk, attitude, lying, and not listening.

I think I like Mean Mommy…

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My Thanks to the Benjamin Boys

I would like to thank Aidan and Sean for performing a public service for me, their mother, the one who would kill and die for them…they used their weekend wisely, judiciously…they have made sure that I will not miss them while I’m traveling for work this coming week…

Isn’t that sweet of them?  I think so…they are so good to their mother…such good boys…

For a brief shining moment, I was happy that their age difference doesn’t impede their ability to play together for long hours…until one child began whining about the toy the other child was holding…and no, it wasn’t just Sean upset that Aidan had his toy…it wasn’t just Aidan upset that Sean was holding a toy that Aidan hadn’t thought of in months…it was both – often simultaneously…

There were those moments when I thought about how wonderful it was that they would let their tired Mommy sleep while they played early in the morning…until I realized every single baby wipe had been pulled out of the container (thanks Sean) or that all of their bedding was brought downstairs to make a “hideout” (thanks Aidan)…

So boys, thank you for making it easy for me to be gone for six days…I will be happy to be home, surrounded by loving, sticky, crying little boys once again…but in the meantime, is it time to leave yet and are we there yet?

 

Conversations With Sean

I heard a little sound behind me.

Me: “You pooted, Sean-Sean!”

Sean: “No, I farted, Mommy…”

And then I heard it again…

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Sean: “Where’s Aidan?”

Me: “He’s in the bathroom, Sean.”

Sean: “You mean he’s in the potty, Mommy.”

Oh, I thought we were using the proper words for things today.

*****

Sean: “Are we going to the washing car today, Mommy?”

Me: “No, we’re not going to the car wash today, baby.”

Sean: “It’s the washing car, Mommy.  It’s called the washing car.  Say washing car!”

For the record, I did not say “washing car.”

*****

Sean: “Where are we going, Mommy?”

Me: “We’re going to pick up Aidan.”

Sean: “And then what?”

Me: “And then we’re going home, Sean-Sean.”

Sean: “Yaaaaay! Yay!”

Me: “Yay!”

Sean: “Don’t say ‘yay,’ Mommy.  Don’t say it!”

*****

His vocabulary exploded about two months ago…but its his thought processes that are the most fascinating.  I don’t remember Aidan being like this at Sean’s age…so I have to assume it’s relatively unique to Sean.  It’s kind of fun talking to him…

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